Its as if people are so damaged at this point, an appeal to humanity and decency is going to be ineffective; and even this appeal will be largely ineffectual, because the ability to rape someone requires their dehumanization.

Which is to say, if you choose engage in that kind of behavior, already you’ve marked someone as prey, and not a person…and asking someone to consider their mother, sister, daughter, isn’t going to change that thought process. They might think of them that way too.

The better question, that gets to the heart of the matter, is what is going on in your head that allows you to (under the circumstances described above) act in that way, and make any attempt to justify it. How can you believe that you are not totally and completely wrong? You can’t really.

The issue is you saw an opportunity, if you have the right moral foundation, against your better judgment, you took it and got caught. Now, you’re mad. That wasn’t how you thought this was going to play out, after all, the rules of this particular game are rigged in favor of men and the privileged- sometimes, this includes black men, but sometimes it does not. It just depends on the circumstances. But black men, being men, want always to be included in this male privilege, often regardless of the moral pitfalls such privilege embraces.

I don’t know the facts involved with the alleged sexual assault that is plaguing Nate Parker, but I do know that these sorts of allegations are to be steered very clear of, and mothers and fathers who want to help their sons be successful in life and avoid pitfalls should tell them as much. Respect yourself-with regard to your sexual activities. Steer very clear of any activity that even mildly approaches that which has been described above.

Here’s the thing — people, all people, recognize that they have certain privileges and use them to their advantage whenever possible. People do it with regard to race, they do it with regard to gender. They do it with regard to a whole host of characteristics.

At the intersection of race and gender in America, this can flip-flop in all kinds of crazy ways — and that’s what we see with Nate Parker. But, here’s what I know, right is right and wrong is wrong- and there is no way two men taking turns with a barely conscious person is right — and these things catch up one way or another, just ask Shug Knight.

So, just do the right thing. Don’t do it for your mother, your sister, your potential daughter, but for yourself! Because you love and respect yourself to much to get caught up in these shenanigans.

That way later on in life, when at the precipice of success, no skeletons can come back to haunt you. And when people claim these skeletons are irrelevant… you shouldn’t heed their advice. You can’t take it to the box office. (Or any office really.)

Working with the Light!

Working with the Light!