Says the man who is not married (I assume) to a big black man and did not raise three huge, well over six feet sons, who did not have to watch society move from adoring them when they were young and cute, to despising them, the bigger they got. Who wasn’t appalled when he took said sons to the local recreation center- to hear of them be denied admission, every time they sought to play basketball, until he showed up and went to the front desk with “what is the problem exactly, why are my sons being denied admission to the center, I pay $90 a month for my membership!”

Who did not have to experience the white clerk- who he look talked to every damn day, right before yoga class, turn bright red and sputter, and stammer- oh! These are your..well um, well, see…

She had no fucking good reason! They were big. They were black. She didn’t want them there.

How the fuck would you feel if this was the way society treated your kids? You would be pissed, I would hope. But who knows. Men tend to be a lot less touchy over these kinds of things.

Well, me and most women ARE NOT. It takes A LOT of energy to raise a child. And when you put that energy into your kids, you don’t want anyone fucking with them!

And this is why I- and so many black women are SO FUCKING ANGRY. White America fucks with our kids and breaks their spirits. And right now, not because of myself, but because of the America my kids are inheriting - I want to kick white America’s collective ass most days. I really do. Sorry if that offends you, but I am a big mama bear. I love my kids and I would die for my kids, so I am never backing down on any of that. And I usually don’t talk about my husband or my kids, because they hate it; and they tell me I am loud and I embarass them, and they don’t need me to do anything for them and they are grown men. (Which they all are…just barely.) Grown men hate it when their mamas get loud and say “stop discriminating against my son!” They hated this when they were young, and they absolutely won’t tolerate it now…and so…I take out my frustrations on Medium, and people like you! Sorry!

I fought the world for my kids when they were little, and now, they have to fight the world for their damn selves. They definitely do it differently than I would, they know they have to. But sometimes, I see shades of me in them. Like my middle child, who was getting kicked out of the mall for no damn reason — told the security officer - “My mom is a civil rights attorney.” And he told me they backed up off of him- and I said, “Way to go son!” That one’s a lot like me (too much actually.) He knows that words have power and he uses the right buzz words, at the right time.

So, I say all of that to say this, comments like, “white people don’t do that” kinda of insulting…I don’t take it personally. It’s a very typical, white response. But black people live with this shit 24/7- and you don’t realize it happens, because you aren’t black and it doesn’t impact you in any way- and that’s fine. It’s kind like how, I only have a very vague idea about how our police terrorize Hispanics. They don’t bother me. In fact police rarely do. But when Hispanics tell me horror stories I 100% believe them, because I know, even though I am not the targeted minority in this case, I have in other instances been. My sons have been harassed, driving while black — and when the police have showed up at my house- most times on some bullshit, but sometimes on some real shit- I have to pull out the civil rights attorney thing to get their basic rights respected.

Not so for white boys. I had a white young man, (one of my sons friends) overdosed in my house. The white cops that arrived on the scene told him, I saved his life, and that he should make sure to come and thank me once he was well enough. (And he did, that’s how I know this.) I don’t know why they told him to do that, I just did what any decent human being would do, (at least I hope.) What was exceptional, at least to me, was the way in which those white police officers so lovingly and tenderly dealt with that young man when they arrived on the scene. He has an extensive criminal record, that one. But they bent over backwards to save his life- as they should have, and I am not knocking them for that. I just want to point out, though — THEY DON’T TREAT US THAT WAY. Believe that.

Also, believe this - black Americans know way more about you, than you will ever know about any of them, because — for one reason, and one reason only - survival.

Working with the Light!

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