Well, this is definitely one of your better posts on race relations, in my humble opinion. You really get right to the heart of the matter when you speak of dehumanizations.
It seems like you have stumbled into the experience of interracial marriage in an unlikely way (which is to say, I don’t think you were looking for it, it just happened to you, that would be my guess.)
This makes you a really odd sort of line crosser. You’re definitely crossing a whole lot of lines!
I think where you slip up however, in dealing with American race relations, is in assuming that Africans can give you any special insight into it. Now to be fair, they can provide you with a bit, based on their own experiences. But Africans who have newly immigrated to America have entirely different experiences than African-Americans who are descendants of the institution of slavery. They relate to the American experience in totally different ways.
African-American racism is based on extreme anger, at this point boiling hot RAGE, over the injustices perpetrated by American institutionalized racism that began with slavery. And just like with the whites, who feel strongly about all that confederate stuff, many blacks feel very strongly about their anger, their rage, their racism against whites, they are entrenched. There is no shaming them out of those beliefs, just as there is no shaming the alt-right out of theirs.
And so, if we really want to move any of these entrenched people, we have to listen and validate. We have to try to understand where they are coming from, even when they say things that makes us really uncomfortable. (This means, you have to try to understand what makes Son of Baldwin so angry. You can’t just dismiss him outright as a racist, if you really want to work on the problem of racism.)
Also, it’s not your work to convince black people not to be racist, it’s my work. (And believe you me it’s quite a job.) I’m telling you it’s not your work, because you would never be trusted by any deeply racist black person. You don’t even know the language that is used to convey black racism or extreme distrust of whites. It is largely coded, and only those who know the codes would even know when it is being expressed. It gets expressed in the workplace a lot, but always in codes. A black person who you might think adores you, might actually secretly hate you. You’d never know, because of the codes. I would know because I know the codes.
Son of Baldwin crosses the lines, by breaking the codes. I’m telling you that he says stuff that a lot of black people say all day everyday. The only difference is, he says in a public forum, where everyone can see it, and in such a way that everyone can understand.
I think he does a public service, because it’s better to get this stuff, all of it, out in the open.
Son of Baldwin makes it clear that most black Americans have an extreme distrust of white Americans. This extreme distrust is not without validation.
Every extremely racist black person I know, can tell me at least 10 horrorific stories of dreadful things that white people have done to them! And I mean these are terrible things, that I would have a hard time believing, if I did not know these people and know them to be honest, forthcoming people.
White people have never treated me in the horrorific ways, they have treated many of my darker relatives. But in some instances, I’ve actually seen the treatment. This is how I know it’s real.
So this is what I mean when I say you don’t understand black racism. You have no idea what’s behind it, and Africans typically have no idea either.
While the race maybe the same, culture, attitudes, experiences are drastically different. Class plays a factor too. Most African immigrants are either affluent or are refugees, either way they tend to be placed in a different class than most African-Americans.
I think Ghanans are pretty cool people. I can honestly say I have never met a Ghanan I didn’t like. I can almost say the opposite about Nigerians. And, to be fair, I’ve only met a handful of people from both countries. But from those experiences I arrive at this, these two cultures are different from one another (Ghanan culture and Nigerian culture.) And both are very different from African-American culture.
Black racism is a product of African-American culture, and its roots, it’s extreme distrust of, disdain and dislike of white people, traces back to slavery and the dehumanization that you spoke of in your post. That dehumanization continues to this day. You don’t believe it, because it’s not a part of your experience. Well, count yourself lucky. But too many African-Americans aren’t so lucky and their extreme anger and rage (justifiable) about their experiences with dehumanization fuels black racism.