Wow…that’s quite a story. Amazing that you were able to overcome such a deep trauma, and so quickly.
I had something similar happen to me around the same age with my father — it was more violent, but actually I think less devastating than what happened to you. It took me a good 20 years to move beyond that trauma..I am still working through it and now it’s been 30 years.
Your mother’s behavior is unnatural. I am guessing has very little to do with you and more to do with her and some trauma she doesn’t want to deal with and has projected onto you. God bless her, as there is something very, very, very wrong there. God bless you for finding the way to move past all that and turn it into a blessing to give to others.